If we repeatedly shove our emotions down, where will they go? Out. Just in not such a productive or effective way. This may look like sadness, anger, or anxiety. I've tried, on many occasions, to shove things down. Take my word for it when I say that while it may seem like a good fix in the moment to avoid "feeling," the long term consequences can be devastating.
As a patient in eating disorder treatment centers, I was frequently asked to sit in the moment and be okay with "feeling." Whether it was with the emotions of guilt, anger, or anxiety, I was guided with deep breathing, guided imageries, and meditation to calm my mind and body. None of those techniques ever worked for me, and so it seemed like I was the exception. I'm sure I'm not alone in this thought: "[insert technique, advice, expectation, blessing, promise, or consequence] is true for everyone else but me. I'm the exception to the rule." Whatever the reason for this belief, we need to also realize it is not true.
At some point during this past week, we all have done something that we knew was "bad" for us and yet we still did it anyways. Whether it was skipping a day of exercise, forgetting to read scriptures or pray, meandering on facebook for too long, or maybe even staying up too late, we did something "bad" this week. Me? I've doubted. My achilles heel in life is believing that I will not live "happily ever after." And while that is my greatest fear, I also know that is not the case. Happiness can occur for everyone and anyone. I am not the exception to that rule. Come what may...I will love it. I will keep my part of the promises that have been made. I will dig deep to find the endurance and perseverance to trust in what will come and what will be. I will find happiness in life.
